(no subject)
Dec. 17th, 2008 11:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thekyttnFaeryn is asleep in her bedroom, and Trixie (her bunny) is rattling things in the rabbit cage. Snuggles is curled up at my feet, and Emo was curled up on my chest, but has now gone to visit with Faeryn.
I'm safe, and under warm covers. My coughing has stopped for the moment. I should be content.
Instead I'm aware of this massive emptiness on the other side of the bed and a I really don't know how I'm going to make it through this holiday, which was so important to Greg. We're approaching a year since my life was shredded into tiny pieces. I still cry at so many little things - like talking to someone about making homemade gatorade. I still don't want to eat Indian food, and I find it painful to see flames of any kind, even in videos or tv. We have a gas fireplace in the basement of this house, and it would be good if we could use it for heat when the power goes out, but I just can't do it.
There is no use whining here. I'm just trying to distract myself from the emptiness, I guess, with no success. It doesn't change anything, anyway.
I'm safe, and under warm covers. My coughing has stopped for the moment. I should be content.
Instead I'm aware of this massive emptiness on the other side of the bed and a I really don't know how I'm going to make it through this holiday, which was so important to Greg. We're approaching a year since my life was shredded into tiny pieces. I still cry at so many little things - like talking to someone about making homemade gatorade. I still don't want to eat Indian food, and I find it painful to see flames of any kind, even in videos or tv. We have a gas fireplace in the basement of this house, and it would be good if we could use it for heat when the power goes out, but I just can't do it.
There is no use whining here. I'm just trying to distract myself from the emptiness, I guess, with no success. It doesn't change anything, anyway.
