(no subject)

[thekyttn]

I guess I must be starting to heal because my old body-image issues are starting to resurface. A year ago I didn't care who thought I was fat or whether they thought my weight makes me ugly. Over the past week, though, I've had something happen every day to make me aware of how huge I am and what I look like to other people and how many other people feel about people my size.

It really isn't a good feeling.

Comments

[maverick-weirdo.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[bardling.livejournal.com]

*hug*

[filkerdave.livejournal.com]

*hug*

[mdyesowitch.livejournal.com]

Yea, for healing.
My neurologist warned me when I started treatment with her that finding a cure for my migraines meant that the stress would go somewhere else and probably manifest itself as depression and I needed to seriously consider getting myself a therapist.

Of course, she was right, as my neurologist is a brilliant researcher and a fantastic human being and I ended up having to find a therapist to cope with the depression and manage the eating and fitness thing, which of course, is another thing that takes a nice bump from stress displacement.

Now that you're starting to process your grief and become this new person, assimilating this new information about yourself into your life, residual stress is going to find another way to go, another focus. And then that will become the thing you need to focus your self-work on. I would definitely discuss this with your therapist. I would definitely welcome this as a sign of healing and positive growth. I would also keep your girl in your head. She is beautiful, even if not normative. You are beautiful. You have to know that.

Unrelated: If you want to send her to me for framing, I got a guy who does a great job. Just let me know if you have a particular objection or inclination towards colours, materials, etc. Otherwise, I'll just let him guide me and his taste is amazing.

[kyttn.livejournal.com]

I'd absolutely love to send my girl to you for framing once she arrives. I've been dreading trying to get it done locally for a number of reasons, and I really don't know anyone here I trust to do an especially good job (though I guess framing a black-and-white photo isn't quite rocket science). When the photo gets here, I'll contact you to figure out the logistics of it all. :)

Re: discussing things with my therapist - I'm frustrated with said therapist. We seem to have casual chat sessions and I never get homework or feel like we are working on anything. We spend the first 30 minutes of the session catching up on what has happened over the last week and the next 15 talking about any hurdles I forsee happening in the coming week. But I like her as a person, and I've been to or worked for far too many of the therapists in town, so for right now am staying put. Or maybe that is because it is easier.

[mdyesowitch.livejournal.com]

Ask the risk of sounding like my annoying exboss, own this. It's your therapy, you have the right to redefine what you want, as often as you like.

I've walked in to my therapist's office and said, "This week, I'd like to work on my problems with bring comfortable in large groups." She's there to address your needs. But she's not a mind reader. She only knows what your needs are when you tell her.

If it's too scary or feels too push, email her in advance or send her a letter, if you don't have her email address and say, "These are the things I feel like need to work on." The check in is great but you don't need 30 minutes of it. Keep that brief and use it steer her towards what you're needing.

[annonynous.livejournal.com]

It sounds like every day over the past week you met a shallow person who said or did something stupid to remind you of your weight. When we spoke at Boskone, it was your face that grabbed my attention. And maybe I saw and heard some of what Greg saw in you that made him so head over heels in love with you. So try to ignore the thoughtless jerks and just be the person that Greg loved.

Paul M.